From Ignorance to Bliss

The things we don't know hurt us and undermine our ability to make necessary changes to become the type of people we want to be, and to create the type of life we want to have. We are familiar with the saying that, "Ignorance is bliss". This saying captures the apparent passive and artificial sense of well being that exists for those who choose to remain ignorant, as they stand in the way of their own evolution. Learning comes with the responsibility to assimilate what we learn into our lives so that we move from unconscious and avoidant behaviours to thoughtful and intentional choices to change and grow.

Those who are "unconciously incompetent" lack awareness and insight into the need for change. Being unaware essentially shows that you are out of tune with yourself and those around you. It can be frustrating to observe someone who is in a meeting and clicks their pen totally unconcious (unaware) that their habit is an irritant to others in the room. Someone in the room may have the courage to says something and then the 'pen clicker' become "conciously incompetent" (aware). He may become aware, yet lacks the ability to actually stop clicking his pen. He then makes a concerted effort to change his behaviour and demonstrates "concious competence" as he resorts to buying pens that do not have a clicking mechanism. This way he takes responsibility by harnessing and changing his behaviour and shows consideration for those around him. If Mr. Pen Clicker continues on in his change process then it becomes his 'new normal' where he is "unconciously  competent" and does right by reflex - he stops clicking his pen and becomes a joy to be around.

Awareness and taking responsibility  become the key ingredients for change that will move you towards bliss. We often become defensive when others point out our flaws and as such remain ignorant of our blind spots. If you are hearing recurrent themes about your behaviours and quirks from various sources in your life it is likely that there is need for change. If you have been told that you tend to be negative and have have a tendency to speak poorly of others see it as an opportunity for change and growth. Instead of resisting the light of awareness that wants to break through in you, embrace it. Cooperating with this awareness brings with it a natural energy that steers you towards responsible and blissful living.

The Workplace Epidemic

Work place bullying is being called a silent epidemic. It is also being considered a phenomena (Salin & Hoel, 2011) that occurs within many organizations and workplaces but it is predominant where there are no anti –bullying policies in place. Salin and Hoel (2011) in their research claim that where such policies are not in place an unspoken message is sent to individuals that bullying is a non issue for us. This creates an organizational vacuum where a distinct type of socialization occurs, as new members automatically adapt to the culture of bullying (Salin & Hoel, 2011).

 

Anxiety, irritability, poor sleep, chronic fatigue, musculoskeletal issues, depression, avoidant behaviour, absenteeism and an inability to cope with stress are some of the correlations that have been confirmed by research to be directly linked to workplace bullying (Hogh et el., 2011). A recent expose` by CBC news on the, “Silent Epidemic” claims, that 40% of Canadians experience some type of bullying in the workplace. http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/windsor/40-of-canadians-bullied-at-work-expert-says-1.987450  The stories in this documentary is heartbreaking to say the least where individuals have felt extremely targeted, unsupported and alone while trying to remain focused and continue to serve within their organizations.

 

This percentage is staggering as anti-bullying studies have been going on for 3 decades - 40% of the Canadian work force feels unsafe. This indicates that we have not been paying attention or we have chosen as a society at large to ignore what researchers have been telling about the emotional, mental and physical erosion of work place bullying. The reality is that individuals who are bullied are attached to family systems who are also recipients of the aftershock of their horrible and traumatizing experiences. There are far reaching familial and societal consequences as a result of bullying behaviour that go un-confronted. Bad behaviour that goes unchallenged becomes behaviour that is accommodated.

 

Finally, research shows that the workplace not only becomes an unsafe place for those being bullied but those who witness the bullying of their colleagues. Secondary trauma is when individuals witness trauma and the witnessing resonates within the witnesses as if the trauma is happening to them directly. The psychological consequence is the same as a child witnessing abuse in the home and feeling powerless to stop it (Berthelsen et el., 2011). Clearly, higher level accountability is required to even the playing field so that patterns of bullying in long established work systems are challenged and changed to minimize the cause and affects of workplace bullying. Managers and leaders must learn the art of leading by influence and not by force and aggression  in order to shift workplace culture from bullying to empowerment.

 

Anything reaching epidemic proportions requires social attention and a commitment by those in positions of influence to address and challenge this culture of work place bullying. Not to challenge it is to accommodate it. This insidious behaviour is allowed to persist and make workplaces toxic arenas in our societies.  To ignore and to avoid this phenomenon in our midst is to show cowardice at a time that calls for courageous leadership.

 

The goal of this blog is to raise awareness for employers and employees alike. It is not to create a platform for an ‘us and they’ scenario but to appeal to our humanity. We can spend upwards of 8hrs a day at our places of work.  We all have a responsibility to create an environment of safety and cultivate a culture of respect in an arena where we spend significant portions of our lives. If you identify with any of the symptoms described earlier in this blog, I want to assure you that you are not going insane and that your stress is real. Reach out for help instead of suffering in silence. It has been said that “evil flourishes when good men do nothing”. I encourage those who witness work place bullying to work through systems in place within your organizations to stand up to bullies. Leaders assess and implement policies in your organizations where all your employees can feel safe and look forward to coming to work instead of dreading their time there.  

 

                                                             References

 Berthelsen, M., Skogstad, A., Lau, B., & Einarsen, S. (2011). Do they stay or do they go?: A longitudinal study of intentions to leave and exclusion from working life among targets of workplace bullying. International Journal of Manpower, 32(2), 178-193.

 

Hogh, A., Mikkelsen, E. G., & Hansen, A. M. (2011). Individual consequences of workplace bullying/mobbing. Bullying and harassment in the workplace. Developments in theory, research and practice, 107-128.

 

Salin, D., & Hoel, H. (2011). Organisational causes of workplace bullying. Bullying and harassment in the workplace: Developments in theory, research, and practice, 227-243.