When Change Becomes Possible …

If we take a quick glance at the landscape of our lives we see that we typically keep what we love and what we are attached to. I have moved several times in my life and each time is an opportunity to purge the things that are no longer current or of value to me. Some painful memories of loss and heartache seem to inadvertently find their way to my next home. These artifacts lay hidden away in storage out of sight but always present in my world.

The same is true of our internals selves. As we take a panoramic view of our emotions, memories and thoughts we will find that disappointment, hurt, loss, broken dreams, hurtful and destructive thoughts and memories insidiously incubate in the deep sometimes not so deep recesses of ourselves, in boxes tagged “historical evidence” neatly wrapped in many coloured bows of avoidance as we attempt to move forward with our lives. 

 

The ‘drag affect’ in physics is known to be “the forces that act opposite to an object in motion” and is typical of headwind resistance to an airplane in flight, slowing down its speed. Conversely, if a plane has the influence of a tailwind then it increases, “the object's speed and reduces the time required to reach its destination.”

The drag affect is true of what happens for us emotionally. We desire change and sometimes feel the sense of urgency and desperation to break through personal barriers and old familial patterns with little success. Paul Simon captures it well in his song, “Slip slidin’ away, Slip slidin’ away, You know the nearer your destination, The more you’re slip slidin’ away “.

 

As long as our “historical evidence” is allowed to follow us, our desire for change is obstructed. What we avoid we incubate but what we challenge and purge leads to change. Historical evidence is just that – evidence from your past which is used to justify our current state, evidence to support our right to be angry, unforgiving or insulated in our misery. We come to embrace our pain not as a guest but as a permanent resident in our lives. We shape and adjust our lives around it ensuring that it is accommodated in case we need to use it as a visa validating our right to be isolated and withdrawn or to be offended and critical. 

If we don’t love our freedom more than we love our pain then …change will never be possible. Unresolved issues and offenses never die they go dormant waiting for the right set of circumstances to become another injury or offense. They act as headwind in your life limiting you and resisting your progress towards a healthier happier life.

Any path to freedom starts with a decision, is fueled by courage, supported by corresponding action and sustained by intentional living. These ingredients act as the headwind in your life taking you closer to your goals. I encourage you today to look at those boxes of “historical evidence” wrapped with bows of avoidance and begin to forgive others, forgive yourself, let go of years of turmoil and pain, create space to design for yourself the type of life you want to have. It is springtime purging is in order.